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  <a href="/home/blog/7694394/my-favourite-records-of-2025">My Favourite Records of 2025</a>&nbsp;
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  <div class="message"><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/32db2e62d263357a204cf8e601ba1003d808ddaa/original/image.png" class="size_orig justify_center border_" height="854" /><p style="text-align:justify;">Some releases from 2025 that I thought were, in some way, remarkable and worth a listen.</p><p style="text-align:justify;">The C Duncan record, <a class="no-pjax" href="https://cduncan.bandcamp.com/album/its-only-a-love-song" data-link-type="url"><i><strong>It's Only a Love Song</strong></i></a><i>,</i> is a major, major piece of work—lushly orchestrated chamber-pop with amazing chord sequences, arrangements, and vocal harmonies. It didn't make nearly as much of a splash as I thought it deserved; perhaps only people who are themselves musicians can really see the craft in it...?</p><p style="text-align:justify;">Cate Le Bon’s <a class="no-pjax" href="https://catelebon.bandcamp.com/album/michelangelo-dying" data-link-type="url"><i><strong>Michelangelo Dying</strong></i></a> is astonishing and abstract in the way the Cocteau Twins’ 1985 EPs seemed to me; the production sounds as if the whole mix has been put through a chorus pedal (not the worst idea; I may have to try that...)</p><p style="text-align:justify;">Deacon Blue—well, I won’t even call them a guilty pleasure anymore. They are one of the bands of my life and I'll defend them forever. Their latest album, <a class="no-pjax" href="https://deaconbluemusic.bandcamp.com/album/the-great-western-road-standard-digital" data-link-type="url"><i><strong>The Great Western Road</strong></i></a><i>,</i> the final one before keyboardist James Prime died this summer, shows some classic songwriting and contains two or three of Ricky Ross’s best songs, in my opinion. </p><p style="text-align:justify;">So many bands tread the reunion circuit and only play the hits; Deacon Blue always have a new album ready to go, and pepper their setlists with obscurities and rarities that they may only play one night on tour. They're a deeper, more hardworking band than "Real Gone Kid" would suggest. But that's the subject for some more serious writing...</p><p style="text-align:justify;">Goldmund’s <a class="no-pjax" href="https://goldmund.bandcamp.com/album/layers-of-afternoon" data-link-type="url"><i><strong>Layers of Afternoon</strong></i></a>—made up of piano and violin—is beautiful, one of the best things Keith Kenniff has ever released in my opinion.</p><p style="text-align:justify;">Roger Eno released <a class="no-pjax" href="https://open.spotify.com/album/6xT2GU7J3KizaVGVZZ5KyU" data-link-type="url"><i><strong>Without Wind, Without Air</strong></i></a><i>. </i>He continues to impress, much more than his brother’s recent work, in my eyes.</p><p style="text-align:justify;">These New Puritans’ <a class="no-pjax" href="https://thesenewpuritans.bandcamp.com/album/crooked-wing" data-link-type="url"><i><strong>Crooked Wing</strong></i></a> has definite Talk Talk / The Blue Nile vibes, with spiky modern edges, which is no bad thing.</p><p style="text-align:justify;">Men I Trust released two albums this year. Out of the two, <a class="no-pjax" href="https://menitrust.bandcamp.com/album/equus-caballus" data-link-type="url"><i><strong>Equus Caballus</strong></i></a> slightly edges it for me, although both are good. Hatchie's new album, <a class="no-pjax" href="https://hatchie.bandcamp.com/album/liquorice" data-link-type="url"><i><strong>Liquorice</strong></i></a><i>, </i>was in a similar vein and was as gorgeous as her stuff always is. </p><p style="text-align:justify;">The Men I Trust and Hatchie records were probably the only classic shoegaze/dream pop releases I really loved this year—largely because I made an effort to listen more widely this year. Blood Orange’s <a class="no-pjax" href="https://open.spotify.com/album/5RUma3H9uzDLXxwT7JzTel" data-link-type="url"><i><strong>Essex Honey </strong></i></a>was a good example of that—it's not usually what I'd consider my thing, but it was my surprise of the year; I adore it.</p><p style="text-align:justify;">The record of the year for me personally has got to be Tamino’s <a class="no-pjax" href="https://open.spotify.com/album/6sUYLSS2QqTtbyqbdy44Y9" data-link-type="url"><i><strong>Every Dawn’s a Mountain</strong></i></a>—Arabic-influenced acoustic pop with occasional dream pop guitars, strings, and Buckley-adjacent vocals. An intoxicating mix I’ve returned to many times.</p><ul> </ul></div>
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    <p class="post-info"><span data-time="2026-01-16T10:14:17+00:00" title="January 16, 2026 10:14">01/16/2026</span></p>

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<h2 class="heading-secondary heading-blog alt-font">
  <a href="/home/blog/7689299/new-release-pearl-daddy-limited-edition-7-inch-concept-single">New Release — “Pearl Daddy” — Limited-Edition 7-inch &quot;Concept Single&quot;</a>&nbsp;
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  <div class="message"><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/2d2ad232117d0d15a602008608cfd076e40b2014/original/mu1.png/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_orig justify_center border_" height="925" /><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>Hello, everybody!</span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>I’m happy to announce my new release, </span><i><span>Pearl Daddy</span></i><span>—a limited-edition “Concept Single” featuring two exclusive tracks, “Pearl Daddy” and “Bilal”. </span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>Strictly limited to 100 copies, it is pressed on 7” white vinyl and presented in a lovingly prepared package with a pull-out 12-page booklet. It will be released on 8 April, but it is </span><a class="no-pjax" href="https://danielland.bandcamp.com/album/pearl-daddy" data-link-type="url"><span><strong>available to order at my Bandcamp page</strong></span></a><span>, where the title track is available to stream now.</span></p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/1895331c992df9a6057053eadaa19a9ce3b05b4d/original/mu2.png/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_orig justify_center border_" height="1200" /><p style="text-align:justify;"><i><span>Pearl Daddy</span></i><span> began life as a slightly geeky joke—the idea of marking my 45th birthday with a 45rpm single. From there, it felt like a natural step to use the songs to reflect on being 45 itself. Middle-aged experience is still rarely addressed in popular music, and middle-aged queer experience even less so; it was this latter perspective that I wanted to begin to explore here. </span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>Rather than leaning heavily into autobiography, I chose instead to write songs informed by my reading of queer literature. This impulse connects to a broader and growing preoccupation in my work with history and identity—something that will be explored much more fully in the album to come.<o:p></o:p></span></p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/272bfc08e142536a50784bcbad3cdc5f8099111f/original/mu3.png/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_orig justify_center border_" height="999" /><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>I wasn’t consciously seeking out writing about Morocco, but in the course of my reading I began to notice a recurring pattern: 20th-century gay writers such as Tennessee Williams, Gore Vidal, and William S. Burroughs repeatedly travelling to Tangier in search of a more hospitable climate for gay life. </span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>That detail gradually suggested a setting and emotional world for the songs, which were inspired by the age-gap love affair between E. M. Forster and Mohammed el Adl, as described in Wendy Moffat’s biography of Forster (and in Damon Galgut’s fictionalised retelling in his novel </span><i><span>Arctic Summer</span></i><span>).</span></p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/fff2ee420c7fd101d0c919f73d3d910fbd9fafac/original/mu5.png/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_orig justify_center border_" height="999" /><p style="text-align:justify;"><span><o:p></o:p></span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>Given this North African context, I’ve tried to subtly expand my usual dream-pop palette with light Moroccan textures and influences, including contributions from Othmane El Mansouri (darbouka and other percussion) and Maryan Karpinskyi (oud), particularly on the second track, “Bilal”. </span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><i><span>Pearl Daddy</span></i><span> is also one of the noisiest things I’ve released, with more distortion and grit than usual—an intentional sidestep rather than a permanent shift in musical direction.</span></p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/fe31d5aa5eba9867c26ebdef0f6d0def281078ab/original/mu4.png/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_orig justify_center border_" height="999" /><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>Alongside the music itself, I wanted to do something intentional with the 7” format and present two songs developed specifically for this release. </span><i><span>Pearl Daddy</span></i><span> is intended as a standalone work; these two tracks will not be compiled or re-released elsewhere. </span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>The songs share melodic fragments and harmonic relationships, and are written as companion pieces: two halves of an affair, each addressed to the other person. This is what I mean by calling it a “Concept Single”—a song cycle, albeit a very compact one.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>I put a great deal of thought into the artwork too. The 7” is housed in a sleeve with a 3mm spine, making room for a 12-page full-colour booklet—a lavish and almost unheard-of addition for the format—containing artwork, lyric fragments, and an essay. The sleeve features my own rustic pastel illustration of the Tangier skyline.</span></p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/0f357957da65e43d8751ddc29eacb2799ab85a17/original/mu6.png/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_orig justify_center border_" height="1200" /><p style="text-align:justify;"><span><o:p></o:p></span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>I’m very happy with how this release has turned out, having put almost as much conceptual thought into it as I would an album. I hope you enjoy it too.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><i><span>Pearl Daddy</span></i><span> will be released by Hinney Beast Records and will be available through UK record shops (distributed by Forte), in China (via Otter Records), and </span><a class="no-pjax" href="https://danielland.bandcamp.com/album/pearl-daddy" data-link-type="url"><span><strong>via my Bandcamp page</strong></span></a><span>.</span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>Yours,</span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>Daniel<o:p></o:p></span></p></div>
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    <p class="post-info"><span data-time="2026-01-09T08:28:47+00:00" title="January 09, 2026 08:28">01/09/2026</span></p>

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  <div class="message"><p><i>Sessions for a new album, coming in late 2026 or early 2027, plus a handful of singles, special releases, and practices for 2026 shows. </i></p><p><i>Locations: Home Studio, London; ‘Summerhome by the Sea’, in West Somerset; Pirate and Storm Studios, London.</i></p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/4cfb3984f099d5a8f058100c96f58868a1a899d7/original/img-20250719-182142-059.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="1080" width="1080" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/4e83787ce51f409953ce441a2682e5f132f1a21f/original/img-20250719-182142-097.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="1080" width="1080" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/e2c1a541da4ae0dcde303a0d3be1ae61535f1bf8/original/img-20250719-182142-136.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="1080" width="1080" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/7ce348b78b5d7a4dde018693f86a4c6356b0c563/original/img-20250719-182142-203.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="1080" width="1080" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/05710568a4513a721fdf563659084d8bee2490c5/original/img-20250719-182142-542.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="1080" width="1080" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/9bbbe712755700ab8f29b271ce5a379cbd2063cf/original/img-20250719-182142-626.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="1080" width="1080" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/a038293be944c9321360c8a70e2109f247e82f43/original/img-20250719-182142-771.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="1080" width="1080" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/7fcab2cf50691e5706f92d5a2befa631de3f900f/original/img-20251011-092214-984.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="1080" width="1080" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/09e7b7bc2b4e13fa00ba217ce3ba2e84144e0699/original/img-20251011-092215-067.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="1080" width="1080" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/d26b0ae37093e789194b3b98fa524257252488dc/original/img-20251011-092215-131.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="1080" width="1080" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/ede0a919f130facb494d99bf0b1d163a2457f603/original/img-20251221-165128-031.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="607" width="1079" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/f10013d008e139691f4df76aaaeacff42799875b/original/img-20251221-165128-176.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="607" width="1079" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/f39fbac3210c2a23c233641e869d7ab495a99058/original/img-20251221-165128-251.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="607" width="1079" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/eeefd31724b96b352f01d057679ef06d14928047/original/img-20251221-165128-702.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="607" width="1079" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/aee6808288cea80d317677a60188af5b70b74201/original/img-20251221-165128-936.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="607" width="1079" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/b45a412bf64f73ced5faee4f278c3ffc3858b2af/original/img-20251224-140447-136.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="1079" width="1080" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/85454a9652684e14f52f949bfedb3f30331e7553/original/img-20251224-140447-286.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="1079" width="1080" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/0da65d3c1c991c4066ce8bdf731f1908dcd2a2ab/original/img-20251224-140447-502.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="1079" width="1080" /><p> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/ebdbd763be5b82a1d5d51746ab716f31b56fa274/original/img-20251224-140447-643.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="1079" width="1080" /><p> </p></div>
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    <p class="post-info"><span data-time="2026-01-07T21:37:28+00:00" title="January 07, 2026 21:37">01/07/2026</span></p>

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  <a href="/home/blog/7625815/riverrun-a-secret-cove">riverrun—A Secret Cove</a>&nbsp;
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  <div class="message"><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/605cbb05cb0fcd9b11ee956b70f01d8354f5b728/original/com.png/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_orig justify_center border_" height="1194" /><p><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);">Out today! The latest album by my ambient side-project, </span><a class="no-pjax" href="/riverrun" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="riverrun"><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);"><strong>riverrun</strong></span></a><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);">.</span><br><br><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);"><i>A Secret Cove </i>is a 60-hour generative ambient composition, and every one of the fifty CDs contains a different 72-minute slice of the music. No two copies are the same.</span><br><br><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);">This release caps the Somerset Trilogy that began with <i>Avalon Marsh </i>and <i>Crow Covert, </i>all of which were put together at my regular retreat in West Somerset.</span><br><br><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);">Available on CD, but also as a download-only version; the download version contains two hour-long iterations of the piece which are the same for everyone who purchases. It's </span><a class="no-pjax" href="https://open.spotify.com/artist/3zonTnSgySJPwyn04rTA2x" target="_blank" data-link-type="url"><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);"><strong>also on Spotify</strong></span></a><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);"> and all reputable streaming services from today.</span><br><br><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);">If you're curious, head to the riverrun </span><a class="no-pjax" href="https://riverrun.bandcamp.com/album/a-secret-cove" data-link-type="url"><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);"><strong>Bandcamp page</strong></span></a><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);"> to stream, download, or purchase on CD.</span><br><br><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);">Now time to turn my attention back to the next song record(s) 😊</span></p></div>
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  <a href="/home/blog/7611251/random-shots-from-a-creative-spring-early-summer">Random Shots From a Creative Spring + Early Summer</a>&nbsp;
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  <a href="/home/blog/7597494/new-riverrun-album-a-secret-cove-50-unique-editions">New Riverrun Album &quot;A Secret Cove&quot; / 50 Unique Editions </a>&nbsp;
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  <div class="message"><p style="text-align:justify;">Hello everybody,</p><p style="text-align:justify;">I'm happy to announce a new album by my ambient side-project <strong>riverrun </strong>called <a class="no-pjax" href="https://riverrun.bandcamp.com/album/a-secret-cove" data-link-type="url"><i><strong>A Secret Cove</strong></i></a><i>. </i>This album closes the Somerset Trilogy, which began with the albums <i>Avalon Marsh </i>and <i>Crow Covert. </i></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>With this release, I’m revisiting an experiment I first undertook with the album </span><i><span>Lilliput</span></i><span> in 2018. Technically, the full version of </span><i><span>A Secret Cove</span></i><span> is a 60-hour generative composition. Each of the fifty CDs contains a different 72-minute “slice” of this larger piece.</span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>Each disc is, in effect, a highly limited art object, since no two copies will contain exactly the same music. And not only will no one else’s version sound exactly like yours, but given the composition’s length, it’s unlikely </span><i><span>even I </span></i><span>will have heard your particular excerpt in full!</span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span style="color:rgb(54,54,54);">The CD version is presented in a digipack with artwork echoing the first two parts of the Somerset Trilogy, and a liner note essay that reflects on the landscape that inspired the album and the wider trilogy</span></p><p style="text-align:justify;">If this sounds like it could be <i>up your strasse, </i>the album is <a class="no-pjax" href="https://riverrun.bandcamp.com/album/a-secret-cove" target="_blank" data-link-type="url"><strong>available on CD from my Bandcamp page</strong></a>. Purchases come with a download of the “Standard” 58-minute version which is also available separately as a download.</p><img src="https://f4.bcbits.com/img/0040122439_10.jpg" class="size_orig justify_inline border_" height="1135" width="1200" /><h3 style="text-align:center;">
<br><strong>_______________________</strong>
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<br><strong>BACKGROUND TO </strong><i><strong>A SECRET COVE</strong></i>
</h3><p style="text-align:justify;"><i><span>A Secret Cove</span></i><span>, like most <strong>riverrun</strong> works, is a patchwork of sonic elements. I create most <strong>riverrun</strong> pieces by letting these elements loop on various cycles (often alongside long stretches of silence). What ends up on the final release is usually just a segment of a much longer whole. Because the loops are unrhythmic and of irregular lengths, it’s entirely possible the full composition could continue generating for years before repeating itself exactly.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>Whereas </span><i><span>Lilliput</span></i><span> was a darker work, built largely around the Dorian mode (close in feel to a minor key), </span><i><span>A Secret Cove</span></i><span> is constructed in the Lydian mode—similar to a major key, but richer, sweeter, and slightly more unsettled (this mode is often associated with the piano works of Harold Budd, for example). Perhaps because of that tonal palette, I think this is one of the more moving <strong>riverrun</strong> pieces. There are passages that feel genuinely touching—which isn’t usually the intention with these works.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>As with </span><i><span>Lilliput</span></i><span>, the piece weaves in material from earlier works; compositional elements from across the Somerset Trilogy are recontextualised here, alongside many additional drones, instrumental takes, and field recordings, some of which were made specifically for this release, others being repurposed “cutting room floor” material originally intended for my song albums. The core element is a background drone, also heard in "Swill Point" (the second side of </span><i><span>Avalon Marsh</span></i><span>), which is an edited and heavily-treated segment of a keyboard pad buried in the background of my song "Summerhome by the Sea" from </span><i><span>Out of Season</span></i><span>. All told, there are perhaps a hundred distinct layers of sound, looping and combining endlessly.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>There’s little in the way of traditional ‘development’, but the piece evolves slowly and organically. Even when the surface textures seem static, the underlying combinations are always shifting—each moment formed of a unique blend of elements, like uncertain light moving across a landscape.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span>I apologise for the slightly higher-than-usual cost of the CD, but as you can imagine, rendering and editing 60 hours of material—and burning each copy individually—is going to be a labour-intensive process. This is also why the pre-order period is a little longer than normal. I do aim to get the CDs to you well before the official release date. And in the meantime, each purchase also includes a downloadable version of the piece: a separate, “standard” 58-minute edition that’s the same for everyone. (I expect to release seasonal updates and new iterations of the composition later this year.)</span></p><h3 style="text-align:center;">_______________________<br><br> </h3><h3 style="text-align:justify;">
<i>SOUTHERNMOST  </i>LIMITED CD RE-PRESS</h3><p style="text-align:justify;">Completists may also be interested to know that I have also put up for pre-order a limited edition CD re-press of the collaborative album <i>Southernmost, </i>which I made with William Delano in 2019. <a class="no-pjax" href="https://riverrun.bandcamp.com/album/southernmost" data-link-type="url"><strong>That is also available from my Bandcamp page</strong></a>. </p><p style="text-align:justify;">Thanks for reading, and all the best</p><p style="text-align:justify;">Daniel </p><img src="https://f4.bcbits.com/img/a2980662472_10.jpg" class="size_orig justify_inline border_" height="1200" width="1200" /><p style="text-align:justify;"><span><o:p></o:p></span></p></div>
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  <a href="/home/blog/7585719/in-memoriam-edmund-white">In Memoriam—Edmund White</a>&nbsp;
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  <div class="message"><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/7c84a4e53cd9795723d3e349ad5287f9e4ee1f84/original/image.png" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="490" width="800" /><p style="text-align:justify;"><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);">I'm absolutely devastated to hear that Edmund White—unquestionably my favourite writer, and the chronicler of a generation—has passed away at 85.</span><br><br><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);">I met him three or four times and he was always funny, generous, and kind. I didn't bug him, but I think he appreciated having a few minutes to talk about his work with someone who got it—literary "celebrity" is no celebrity at all, really. After one lengthy conversation, he gave me his home and email addresses; I didn't write to him because I thought it would be a little crass. I also knew from his writing that he was a bit of a people-pleaser; would he <i>really </i>welcome my contact? I never found out because I never wrote to him, although I now wish I had.</span><br><br><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);">It took me a while to warm to his work (which I now realise is generally a good sign). The first time I read <i>The Farewell Symphony</i>, in 1999, I was young, still in thrall to Virginia Woolf and, frankly, a little bored. White’s subtle, elegant prose style felt like no prose style at all in comparison. The fault was all mine, of course.</span><br><br><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);">I’m not sure what made me pick up <i>The Farewell Symphony</i> again in 2002 (well—okay—I do: by that point I was living a life in Manchester that rhymed with White's experiences of the 1970s, documented in the novel). I read it three times in succession—something I’ve never done with any other book. </span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);">I suddenly saw what I was missing: it was so elegant, so full of beauty and longing and regret; so stuffed with startling metaphors, and vivid imagery, and fresh perspectives. It reshaped the way I saw relationships and intimacy. I would be a different person had I not encountered it, which is not something I can really say about any other book.</span><br><br><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);">Since then, I’ve had 23 years of exploring everything he’s published, and eagerly anticipating each new release. I was lucky enough to be connected with his husband, Michael Carroll (also a great writer), on socials—which allowed me to keep up with Edmund’s exploits at one remove. I understand there are still two works to be published, now posthumously.</span></p><p style="text-align:justify;" data-start="932" data-end="1757">I’ve learned quite a few things from Edmund White during the time that I've admired his work—things that I’ve applied to my music in ways that might not be immediately obvious. First, I suppose, would be the sophisticated moral perspective he brings to bear on his characters (or, since he is an autobiographical novelist, the people he knew)—an outlook that resists sentimentality or cynicism, that employs a clear-eyed realism about desire, compromise, and human limitation—what I sometimes think of as a kind of “moral longsightedness”: people in the rear-view mirror are treated with compassion and mercy and fairness, even if at the time they caused pain, heartbreak, or even professional frustration.</p><p style="text-align:justify;" data-start="1759" data-end="3129">I’d like to think that this has been reflected in many of the songs I’ve written since <em data-start="1860" data-end="1888"><i>The Dream of the Red Sails</i></em>. The songs that feel most successful to me, lyrically—and to my bandmates too—are those written from a place of compassion towards people who are not typically the recipients of such feelings: ex-partners, passing hook-ups, even, at times, my younger, more conflicted self (White has said elsewhere that the gay “superpower” is the ability to remain friends with one’s exes). That ethos has found its way into much of my recent writing (“Cobalt Blue", “Skindivers”, “Long Before the Weather”, “Southern Soul”, and even the <a class="no-pjax" href="https://danielland.co.uk/home/blog/7572980/poem-on-wishing-a-happy-birthday-to-my-ex-boyfriend" target="_blank" data-link-type="url"><strong>poem I published last year</strong></a>)—these pieces are all predicated upon a feeling of: <i>we were, once, something to each other. Even if that’s passed, I’m grateful for your love, no matter how temporary, and no matter how partial.</i></p><p style="text-align:justify;" data-start="3131" data-end="4024">A second, and major, thing I've learned from Edmund comes from understanding the arc of his career—I feel that my work has moved from the lyrically opaque towards the transparent in a way that mirrors his development as a writer. Edmund’s first two novels, <em data-start="3519" data-end="3558"><i><span>Forgetting Elena</span></i></em> and <em data-start="3563" data-end="3602"><i><span>Nocturnes for the King of Naples</span></i></em>, were dense, formally experimental (often described as “baroque”) and attracted only a small readership. But by the time he reached <em data-start="3732" data-end="3771"><i><span>A Boy's Own Story</span></i></em>, he had moved away from abstraction towards the elegant, plain prose style (and queer, autobiographical content) for which he is now best known. This shift was undertaken in pursuit of what he later called “total transparency”. As he wrote in <em data-start="4006" data-end="4016"><i>City Boy</i></em> (2010):</p><p style="text-align:justify;" data-start="4026" data-end="4432"><i>I’d acknowledged that life had handed me a brand-new subject and that my job was to present it in the clearest, least wavering light. A straight writer, condemned to show nothing but marriage, divorce and childbirth, might need a new formal approach or an exotic use of language. But a gay writer, free to record for the first time so many vivid and previously uncharted experiences, needed no such tricks…</i></p><p style="text-align:justify;" data-start="4434" data-end="4583">I’ve come to feel a strong affinity with that sentiment, and I recognise I've been moving towards the musical equivalent of this for most of my career. It strikes me how rarely queer musicians have been given the space to present the full range of our interior lives. And yet there is something inherently compelling, to me, about filtering those experiences—with their particular heartbreaks and ecstasies, their quirks and rough edges—through the shoegaze genre, which offers such a richly expressive palette; which is capable of holding ambiguity, melancholy, and transcendence—sometimes all at once.</p><p style="text-align:justify;" data-start="5048" data-end="5693">If I’ve ever had reservations about the genre I work in, it’s because, lyrically, at its most vapid, it can become little more than hazy escapism: all those nauseating skyward glances and drug metaphors. These have long felt to me like a squandering of the genre's emotional potential. </p><p style="text-align:justify;" data-start="5048" data-end="5693">I don’t think I’ve ever claimed that my work is "innovative", in the sense of pushing the sonic boundaries of the genre (in fact, having studied a master’s degree in the Musicology of Record Production, I’ve come to think the whole concept of “innovation” is often misapplied and misunderstood—but that's a different essay). What I've learned from Edmund, I think, is that there are other ways to be “new”. That innovation can reside in subject matter (or even things like vocal delivery style) not just in advancing the technical edges of a genre. </p><p style="text-align:justify;" data-start="5048" data-end="5693">Which is to say, I'm not interested in pushing the envelope sonically; I'm interested in pushing the envelope emotionally, and thematically. What interests me is achieving the same “total transparency” that White describes: being vulnerable, being honest, and mapping a particular (and sometimes <i>perculiar) </i>emotional reality onto genres that have not traditionally been a home for those kinds of narratives. This feels like a kind of <i>intra-generic novum</i>—a small innovation from within—one that is inherently interesting, since what is being described is (to borrow one of Edmund's phrases in <i>The Farewell Symphony) </i>“a whole new world of experience”.</p><p style="text-align:justify;" data-start="6327" data-end="6506">I adored this man. Not just his writing—which quite inadvertently helped me come to a deeper understanding of my own work, and for which I’ll always be grateful—but also him personally: the example he set of someone generous and open with his time, willing to help or to offer an ear to younger writers, artists, and even musicians. I will sorely miss his wit, his sly, impish sense of humour and, of course, the thrill of purchasing, receiving and reading his newest work.</p><p style="text-align:justify;" data-start="4971" data-end="5187" data-is-last-node="" data-is-only-node=""><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);">I actually have a more substantial essay on his writing, which I've been pecking away at for a year or so; I think I’ll probably furbish that up, and publish it. But I suppose my main thought is that I feel somewhat as I did when Harold Budd died. Other people felt this with Bowie, or during the wave of celebrity deaths in 2016. But for me, it feels as though the era of losing one’s most beloved artists is only just beginning.</span></p><p style="text-align:justify;"><span style="color:rgb(0,0,0);">Rest in peace, lovely man.</span></p></div>
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<h2 class="heading-secondary heading-blog alt-font">
  <a href="/home/blog/7572980/poem-on-wishing-a-happy-birthday-to-my-ex-boyfriend">Poem: On Wishing a Happy Birthday to my Ex-Boyfriend </a>&nbsp;
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  <div class="message"><p data-start="426" data-end="539">Something a little different from me—a poem I wrote yesterday, on the occasion of my ex-boyfriend’s birthday.</p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/b53a71416bf3b2dd9bba20fa1474d4bd0d01e42f/original/poem01.png/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="854" width="853" /><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/cb4f6a8db64931bc897d9b871f1071b09965eed1/original/poem02.png/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="855" width="850" /><p data-start="541" data-end="952"> </p></div>
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    <p class="post-info"><span data-time="2025-05-09T13:43:38+01:00" title="May 09, 2025 13:43">05/09/2025</span></p>

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  <a href="/home/blog/7529394/in-memoriam-dr-michael-halls">In Memoriam—Dr. Michael Halls</a>&nbsp;
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  <div class="message"><div class="xdj266r x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs x126k92a" style='-webkit-text-stroke-width:0px;background-color:rgb(255, 255, 255);color:rgb(8, 8, 9);font-family:"Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:15px;font-style:normal;font-variant-caps:normal;font-variant-ligatures:normal;font-weight:400;letter-spacing:normal;margin:0px;orphans:2;overflow-wrap:break-word;text-align:start;text-decoration-color:initial;text-decoration-style:initial;text-decoration-thickness:initial;text-indent:0px;text-transform:none;white-space:pre-wrap;widows:2;word-spacing:0px;'><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/77f0ca798e7cd86339555d4cb1d739a33799570d/original/michael01.jpg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_orig justify_center border_" height="675" /><p style="text-align:justify;"><i>[Note regarding a quick update in 2026, a year after original posting: with a handful of minor changes to make things contextually clear (including the first sentence, the video at the end, and the last paragraphs) this text is mostly taken from my in-progress memoir about homophobia in the South West in the late 1990s. I'd like to take this opportunity to sincerely thank all those who knew Michael, who have since emailed, or posted below, with their kind words about the Michael, or the text, or for sharing their own reminiscences of this major, deeply beloved figure in my life]</i></p>
<p style="text-align:justify;">I’m devastated to learn that one of my heroes, Dr. Michael Halls, passed away two years ago, without my knowing.<br><br>In 1997, Michael co-founded a charity offering advice and support to victims of homophobic crime and bullying in the South West. I volunteered there full time until I left Devon, from 1999 to 2000, working with him in a small office, and on many projects, including an anti-homophobic bullying campaign, which led a "first of its kind" set of guidelines being sent to every school in Britain, addressing homophobic bullying in a way that bypassed Section 28—the then-current law that silenced discussions on homosexuality in schools.<br><br>The Trust had a helpline, largely staffed by Michael, and each week we handled calls from victims of homophobic and transphobic crime. Every story was heartbreaking. A teenage boy might recount how childhood friends—ones he had known since toddlerhood—suddenly turned on him and began a relentless barrage of insults: “gay-boy,” “bum-boy,” “fucking faggot”, the taunting cry of “Backs against the wall, the faggot’s coming!” Victims frequently dismissed this verbal abuse, or being spat on, or even physical attacks, as something they could “put up with” or wait out, hoping the problem would fade. <br><br>It rarely faded. Anonymous calls woke families in the dead of night. Windows were smashed; eggs hurled against doors; the word <strong><u>QUEER!</u></strong> spray-painted across garage doors and garden walls. Fresh dog shit was left steaming on doorsteps in the winter cold. We took one call from someone who’d had human excrement shoved through their letterbox. <br><br>By the time a victim finally called us, their voice shaking, they had often endured months of horror. One of five would have attempted suicide at least once. And yet Michael often reminded me that the true scale of the problem was far greater than we could see. A recurring theme in our discussions was the chronic underreporting of homophobic crime in rural areas. A core part of the Trust’s work, he believed, was building victims’ confidence to step forward.<br> </p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/d1c1b12fe626d21b6e5b9cff90556267b1b4f0fc/original/michael02.jpg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_m justify_center border_" height="320" /></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style='-webkit-text-stroke-width:0px;background-color:rgb(255, 255, 255);color:rgb(8, 8, 9);font-family:"Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:15px;font-style:normal;font-variant-caps:normal;font-variant-ligatures:normal;font-weight:400;letter-spacing:normal;margin:0.5em 0px 0px;orphans:2;overflow-wrap:break-word;text-align:start;text-decoration-color:initial;text-decoration-style:initial;text-decoration-thickness:initial;text-indent:0px;text-transform:none;white-space:pre-wrap;widows:2;word-spacing:0px;'>
<p style="text-align:justify;">Michael once showed me a report where 80% of South West schools acknowledged homophobic bullying but did nothing about it. He worked tirelessly with both schools, and local police to change attitudes towards the community. <br><br>His efforts paid off. Within three years, largely as a result of his training them, Devon &amp; Cornwall Police had become one of the country’s leading forces for LGBTQ+ outreach and a frontrunner in tackling homophobic crime. This transformation—within what had once been one of the UK’s most homophobic institutions—was largely down to Michael’s persistence, his constructive criticism, and his mastery of the subtle politics involved in dealing with large, resistant institutions like the police.<br><br>He ran the charity almost single-handedly, but always found time for me, offering guidance and support during my own struggles, which were legion at the time. He was a great educator, a friend, and the author of <i>Homophobia and The Bible: A Self-Defense Manual</i>, which shows how the supposedly "homophobic" passages of the old and new testaments are actually the result of a millennia of maliciously poor translation choices.</p><img src="//images.zoogletools.com/s:bzglfiles/u/158064/2507180ab2242f7ae4a48989e560bfb9807d5d7f/original/michael03.jpg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==" class="size_l justify_center border_" height="357" /></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style='-webkit-text-stroke-width:0px;background-color:rgb(255, 255, 255);color:rgb(8, 8, 9);font-family:"Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:15px;font-style:normal;font-variant-caps:normal;font-variant-ligatures:normal;font-weight:400;letter-spacing:normal;margin:0.5em 0px 0px;orphans:2;overflow-wrap:break-word;text-align:start;text-decoration-color:initial;text-decoration-style:initial;text-decoration-thickness:initial;text-indent:0px;text-transform:none;white-space:pre-wrap;widows:2;word-spacing:0px;'>
<div style="font-family:inherit;text-align:justify;" dir="auto">Michael studied at Cambridge, where he’d written a doctoral thesis exploring the interplay between language and illustration in religious and scientific literature. I used to love how he’d sit down with a cup of lapsang souchong, spreading the <i>Times Literary Supplement </i>or the <i>London Review of Books </i>over his lap, to see what his “contemporaries”—Hermione Lee, Terry Eagleton, John Carey—were up to. <br><br>He had a sharp eye for academic absurdity and was a connoisseur of the hideously overwrought art-writing that was quoted in <i>Private Eye’s </i>“Pseud’s Corner”. I could always tell when he was about to share an especially egregious example of this, or of some academic waffle, when I’d notice him shaking in the corner of the room, his tuts of disbelief escalating into a hooting fit of laughter so intense it would leave him coughing, his cigarette wobbling precariously and scattering ash across the page as he struggled to regain composure.<br><br>He wouldn’t let any homophobic slur pass uncommented, and he scanned the papers every day for the latest outrage. The charity's filing cabinet had “Bigots” folder where he’d store cuttings from the Tory politicians, “Family Rights” groups, and fusty Colonel Blimp types who were frothing at the mouth over the slow, unstoppable march towards gay equality—along with, in many cases, his own calm, rational, perfectly-worded “Letter to the Editor” replies. <br><br><span>Because of course, homophobic bullying wasn’t just a problem confined to school corridors and playgrounds; it was the symptom of a much larger societal sickness. Michael would often point out how deeply embedded these prejudices were, how they seeped into every corner of life. “These kids aren’t inventing this hatred,” he’d say, pointing to the letters printed in local papers, or in the way a vicar might casually sermonise against gay marriage, equating love with sin. </span><br><br><span>He saw the Intercom Trust’s work as part of a broader campaign to shift society itself, to change hearts and minds as well as laws. Of course, know-nothing bigots would cry, with alarm, that our efforts were an attempt to “promote homosexuality” (which was the exact language used in the legislation, Section 28). But that wasn’t the point: we weren’t trying to make straight kids gay. We’re trying to make gay kids survive.<o:p></o:p></span>
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<p style="text-align:justify;">He was very private, and this is the only clip I've been ever been able to find of him speaking, but here he is in typically articulate fashion, talking with pride about the grant the charity received from police and crime commissioners, about ten years ago:<br> </p><div class="video-container size_xl justify_center" style=""><iframe data-video-type="youtube" data-video-id="UqOJmSmrouY" data-video-thumb-url="" type="text/html" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/UqOJmSmrouY?rel=0&amp;wmode=transparent&amp;enablejsapi=1" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="true"></iframe></div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style='-webkit-text-stroke-width:0px;background-color:rgb(255, 255, 255);color:rgb(8, 8, 9);font-family:"Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:15px;font-style:normal;font-variant-caps:normal;font-variant-ligatures:normal;font-weight:400;letter-spacing:normal;margin:0.5em 0px 0px;orphans:2;overflow-wrap:break-word;text-align:start;text-decoration-color:initial;text-decoration-style:initial;text-decoration-thickness:initial;text-indent:0px;text-transform:none;white-space:pre-wrap;widows:2;word-spacing:0px;'><p style="text-align:justify;">It’s been a few years since we last spoke, but we met for lunch every five years or so, and he was frequently on my mind. I regret not reconnecting sooner. His impact on my life and on countless others will never be forgotten.</p></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style='-webkit-text-stroke-width:0px;background-color:rgb(255, 255, 255);color:rgb(8, 8, 9);font-family:"Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;font-size:15px;font-style:normal;font-variant-caps:normal;font-variant-ligatures:normal;font-weight:400;letter-spacing:normal;margin:0.5em 0px 0px;orphans:2;overflow-wrap:break-word;text-align:start;text-decoration-color:initial;text-decoration-style:initial;text-decoration-thickness:initial;text-indent:0px;text-transform:none;white-space:pre-wrap;widows:2;word-spacing:0px;'><p style="text-align:justify;">Farewell, old friend.<br><br><i>“Atque in perpetuum, frater, ave atque vale…”</i></p></div></div>
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